thought log 3: 31 August 2015 – 5.30pm
having lived in her thoughts and went through an entire life and wealth of experiences in a dizzyingly fast 3 hours, I stepped out of the room…and I could not feel a thing.
it was a sense of detachment, like I am no longer living my life, my brain was possessed by a memories of a geisha who lived so extraordinarily I get afraid mine would dull so much in comparison. I left my body to bask in yellowed-pages and words that contained more colour than all my feelings combined, but when I returned, everything felt so alien. how the sunlight sparked off linoleum tiles and grey railings, how I noticed the yellow flowers blooming on the tree for the first time, how I felt so renewed, and the troubles I faced last midnight became so inconsequential. it gives me pity to have abandoned the pleasure reading afforded me in favor of cold facts spewed from a Pearson or Marshall Cavendish. as I stared into the mirror, I feel as if my skin had been pulled back and reshaped around the new enlightenment, I was born again, inadvertently changed by a book I had whimsically decided to read only the first few pages, but ended up spinning through its entirety.
I feel my soul resettling back, conforming itself back into the familiar angles of my body once again. I can only hope to chase this feeling, I shall call it my nanune, and enjoy the blissful minutes I have with it, and I don’t know how long I have to wait for the next one to come.